


theres a reason i wake up alone in strange places

by newsagogo



Series: i didnt know i was broken 'til i wanted to change [1]
Category: Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys - My Chemical Romance (Album), The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Comic)
Genre: Gen, Post-Canon, theres a ref to vinyl/volume but i did NoT expand on it muchly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:07:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25791829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newsagogo/pseuds/newsagogo
Summary: the trick to getting over it is that you never really do. val velocity tries to pick up the pieces of a life without BL/ind, and learns to live.
Series: i didnt know i was broken 'til i wanted to change [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1871935
Comments: 8
Kudos: 20





	theres a reason i wake up alone in strange places

**Author's Note:**

> what if i wrote about val but with a "that focus on revenge probs wasnt healthy for rekationships"and how to live without thst singular goal in a place w/o therapy but many angry young adults determined to do better and be kind.  
> titles from Everybody Lost Somebody by Bleachers

The days are strange now. Emptier. The skin around Vals eyes aches without his mask, but he's left that behind. The City has fallen and by all rights he should be still celebrating but.

But here he is, as far away as he can walk, at a midpoint of zone two and zone three (if it's there today). He isn't sure if he wants people to notice him. Val leaves his signature jacket in the next cache of supplies he finds and picks up the patched brown one there. He's got nothing to cover his hair with but he keeps walking anyways.

It's about a week after Everything, and people are finding a new rhythm to step into. Regimented city steps mix with the wild beats of the desert, as crews learn how to be without the threat of patrols. Radios linked to solar panels start popping up in areas, playing static but on occasion Val will hear a woman's voice he thinks he knew. Crow cars haphazardly covered in paint and scrawls of celebration flash by, offering rides for any who ask as killjoys take it upon themselves to help city citizens reunite with lost family or learn to make their own. He avoids every mailbox he remembers the site of. Folks pass by carrying masks to show the new influx of people the significance that Val has never cared for or respected but as he watches them, he thinks he misses something. He sees more and more mini-settlements pop up as people try and learn how they want to live, and hopes noones looking for him.

A month after Everything, the red has faded and Val cant bring himself to try reclaim it. He slides into one of the older buildings used for hideouts in search of food and stops. There, standing with his mask tied to his belt, is Vinyl. He seems as shocked by Vals sudden appearance as Val is to see him. He looks… settled, Val thinks. There's a purple streak to his hair now, matching the bracelet on his wrist. The colour makes him remember Volume, and something aches. They stand, frozen, before Vinyl hums and beckons Val to follow him, over to a half fallen staircase where someone who shares an awful lot of Vinyls features sits.

Once he joins them, and has food pressed into to his hands, Vinyl speaks. 

"You left."

it's not a question. But Val bristles anyways. Why is he being accused? Why not ask how he is? 

"Like you care," he sneers. "You didn't wait long before finding someone else to follow behind."

Vinyl doesn't rise to the bait. He stares at the table, twists his bracelet around his wrist and tilts his head towards the other person in their space, observing quietly. "...my brother." he states. Val stares. "Since when do you have a brother?" the words are out of his mouth before he can stop them and Vinyl just seems to grind to a stop. 

Vinyls brother drops his (thankfully empty) bowl. Vinyl himself turns to val and suddenly, Val feels cold. "Volume cared about you," he starts "and because I loved him, I will be as kind as possible to you when I say this: if you had ever tried actually listening to the people around you, instead of your anger, you'd know a lot more than that." His brother places a hand on his arm, and whispers "I think this has been enough of a catchup."

Val knows an excuse to leave when he hears one. He bolts from the staircase, and back to the sands outside. He thinks he hears Vinyl start to cry, and runs faster.

* * *

His hairs long enough to be tied back now, and he spends 2 days in zone five, ostensibly not hiding, and when he ventures into zone two he finds over a week has passed in those days. Edging closer to the old borders of what was "The City" (people seem to be trying out new names for it, he's several signs and leaflets saying where to put suggestions ("The City….2!" seems to have an awful lot of support)) taking in the dirt and colour that seems to have been thrown wherever possible, covering up the artificial whiteness. As he wanders in, a few people take note of him and start whispering. Some wave, though he has no clue who they are, and eventually he's approached by an (ex?)pornodroid and a girl with as many scars on her dark skin as the droid has scratches. Val eyes them warily but before he can tell them to leave the girl grins and says "With a scowl like that you've got to be Vamos' white boy." a strange buzzing noise comes from the droid (is that how they laugh?) and the droid says "if you're looking for Vamos, they'll be back around sunset. Vaya is in one of the new allotments." 

But before he can ask where that is the girl tugs the droids arm and says "Follow this street, its on the roof of the building with paint handprints all over it!" as she starts dragging them off to wherever they were heading. "The doors open!" shouts the droid as they get dragged down a sidealley as their companion laughs.

Vaya is covered in dirt and surrounded by green with what looks to be wires threaded through their braid when Val finally makes his way up the staircases and up one of the many constructed ways to climb up to the roof via window and… what looks to be a bunch of ropes tied between buildings to make a somewhat worrying looking ladder. As he steps over the remains of what must have been fencing, Vaya turns smiling, calling out a hello before they realise who's actually climbed up. Val is surprised at this, usually Vaya and Vamos are loud and grinning when they see him. As Vaya watches him cautiously, Val rocks on his feet. 

"So… odd that you're not here with Vamos, huh?". That was definitely the wrong thing to say, he thinks, as Vaya's expression goes blank and is replaced by a look of anger. 

"We're not the same person" they spit. "I don't have to always be where Vamos is and they don't always have to be where I am. We've got our own interests Val, Witch take me." They pause, inhale deeply, and continue in a calmer tone "I guess it's nice to see you again anyways."

"...sorry" Val murmurs. He doesnt think either of them has been so mad at him since... since ever, really.

Vaya only looks over, throws a "Noted." his way, and continues moving plants around for reasons Val doesnt know and doesn't feel comfortable asking after all that. After a while, Vaya stands up and takes off the gloves they were wearing. "I've managed to end up leading this growing stuff," they tell him, apropos of nothing. "Plants just work really well for me. Everyones trying to figure out a way to make sure there's fresh food for everyone. We're trying to get something that can grow outside this Wrecks old weather control system. C'mon!" 

With that they drop over the side of the building, onto the rope abomination strung between this and the next, and crawl through a window. "If you don't speed it up I'm ditching you!" they call up. Val speeds it up.

Now that he's actually looking at the insides of the building, he's actually shocked. Vaya leads him through twists and turns and the odd knocked down wall to an area somewhere between the entrance and a first floor. It's an old detention building, he realises with a start. Or, at least partially. People have trashed most of what would remind them of its old uses (and a few walls) and there are frames on some walls where panels of glass must have once been. Paints have been thrown, dye spilled, and drawing scrawled and covered up and rescrawled everywhere he looks. scattered groups of humans and droids sit comfortably together, and children flit between them all. It reminds Val of when he first got to the Zones as a kid. The sense of community that he didn't realise he missed so badly. There's an old rusted droid, more scraps than parts, telling a story to the small crowd of wide-eyed children and droids that surround him. Vaya glances at his wonder, and smiles. Maybe they slow down to let Val take it all in, but they wont say so if asked. 

There are people in a kitchen (or at least an area that got converted to one) with a crooked sign saying "grab if u r hungry" above a table of mismatched plates and bowls. There's a room where a man is stood, holding onto an old photograph and crying. There's more people feeling more emotions than Val has seen since Everything happened and the lost feeling just keeps growing stronger as he sees this new life people have chosen to make and learn to live in.

Eventually, Vaya leads Val to a windowsill, with boards connecting to the building next-door. Sat there is Vamos, oil smeared across their forehead and hair shaved into an undercut but with wires matching Vaya's twisted around into a necklace. When they spot him, they wave excitedly and crow his name. Vamos hugs him when he's close enough, and a part of Val realises that while he left his deep in the sands somewhere, all the other Vs still wear their masks in some way. 

  
  


Vaya gets him a new change of clothes, a far cry from his old white and latest ratty brown, and Vamos sends him off with the knowledge that Vinyl does forgive him, but distance for the next few weeks is best for them. Something in Val loosens at that, and for the first time in months he has the slightest smile as he wanders back into the Zones.

* * *

_He dreams. He doesn't do that often. He sees two figures in his dreams and turns around to see a witch he doesnt believe in. In his dream he shouts at her that shes not real bit the witch ignores it. She waits for him to stop, and as he shakes the Witch embraces him, and he lets himself cry. Her feathers cloud his vision and he says he is lost but she only holds him tighter and says that she knows but he has to find his own way. she promises to give him what help she can and he wakes with a plain mask in his hands and the afterimage of an explosion of fury behind his eyelids. he looks for The Girl he took his anger out on and brushes the feathers off his jacket._

* * *

He follows a trail of mailboxes and shadows up to his final stop. He's figured out by now that he just wants to actually speak with people, as Vinyls words still ring in his head. It's the radio station where they're staying currently. A radio station where he might have done the cruellest action yet. He sits outside, apolite distance, and waits. Eventually, whatever that watches over her lets her know he's outside. She comes out, takes quick steps towards him, and slaps him across the face. She glares, anger in her eyes made brighter by the sparks in her tightly coiled hair, and he sighs. One hand to his face, Val admits "I deserved that."

"Why are you here?" She demands. 

"I'm sorry. That's all. Took the last of your family from you. Been visiting people and realising where I've gone wrong."

"And if I don't accept it?"

Val shrugs. He knows some things can't be forgiven, and he was willing to go far in his rage against BLI. The Girl stares at him, and relaxes slightly.

"Well. You've said your piece. That's us done. Are you heading back to whatever you do now then?"

"I don't have anything. There's nothing left for me in this world."

He startles when she barks a laugh. 

"Don't be stupid, Velocity. Go find something to do. Just 'cause your revenge finally happened doesn't mean no-one else needs help." and with that, she turns and walks back up to an older woman who lays a hand on her head. She makes eye contact with him, and he feels deep in his bones that this isn't a rift to heal now but someday. someday they might be able to be friendly.

* * *

Eventually, Val returns to the city. He ignores the ghosts of where he used to live and meanders through the streets as he wonders if he should join a building. Eventually, he stumbles back into the girl and droid who take one look at him, grab an arm each and drag him off to the block of flats their groups taken over. He learns about each person there, every droid who passes through, spends nights sat on the floors of different flats asking questions just to hear answers. He picks up delivery as his role in this new life, carrying goods and passing messages between the ever-stretching mix of zone kids and city brats, travels from the centre if the city to the edge of the zones, watching as people move beyond the borders thought final and finding even more people just waiting to reach out.

Some days he spends on rooftop gardens with Vaya, learning to coax life from the earth and making increasingly bizarre guesses as to what Vamos does during the day just to make Vaya throw their gloves at him while Vamos laughs to tears. Some days he'll pass with Vinyl if they meet while out on a job (and Vinyls brother insists on a hug with every Hello and See You Later). If he meets The Girl at a stop and she makes room for him nearby, he won't push her to talk with him. Months down the line, they'll both have healed enough for her to share her name. Eventually, she and her mother will make enough visits into the city to have people keeping spare room for them to stay overnight as she reconnects with everyone she knew (or used to know).

On rough nights, he sits on the roof and takes comfort in the people milling around rooftops to escape their nightmares, just as he does. A scarred girl and scratched droid check up on him and any other when they hear the creaks and clangs of someones dreams chasing them up to open air. In the ashes of BLI people refuse to stay strangers for long, and make friends and family as easy as breathing. They share blankets and hot drinks regardless of weather, swap stories and good news and fears. As he sits near the nights poor sleepers populated by friends old and new, Val realises for the first time in years that he finally stopped feeling alone. The Ultra Vs are no more, but in their place Val has people to care for and care for him in return. 

Val Velocity has found his place in life, and he is _happy_.

**Author's Note:**

> yknow whats funny about this. this is my longest fic and i dont even stan val. firmly in the "dude fucked up and didnt have a proper arc bc poor writing" camp but i got too caught up in "what are they all... doing..."


End file.
